Be All Things - erasure poetry

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 Found and Erasure poems are a completely new thing for me.  I am feeling perhaps I "did it wrong," since I started with a poem and pulled out words to make a poem.  I wrote it before the prompt was up and the wonderful advice and processes were shown.  Once I started, I found it hard to stop!  This was the one that resonated with me, for obvious reasons.  I'll try using a random old magazine.
 
Prayer to Persephone by Edna St. Vincent Millay


Be all things

Proud

Wild

Flippant

Arrogant

Free

Take your knee

  ©2020 Lisa Smith Nelson. All Rights Reserved

 

Comments

  1. Rosemary Nissen-WadeOctober 27, 2020 at 11:29 PM

    Oh, you didn't do it wrong. You did an erasure of Millay's poem, made it into something new and your own – with startling, defiant relevance to today's world – and quite properly shared your source. You did it very right! And there are various other ways to do it right, too; have fun exploring!

    ReplyDelete
  2. Old EggOctober 28, 2020 at 1:21 AM

    Be that way if you can otherwise you will always regret not doing so.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. LisaNovember 1, 2020 at 11:04 AM

      True. And regrets feel terrible. Guilty, like we let ourselves down, which could be the case depending on what we didn't do.

      Delete
  3. Kim M. RussellOctober 28, 2020 at 2:38 AM

    Nicely done, Lisa!

    ReplyDelete
  4. Ron.October 28, 2020 at 6:01 AM

    Thumbs up, Lisa!

    ReplyDelete
  5. Gillena CoxOctober 28, 2020 at 7:49 AM

    Bravo. Well wrought

    Much💛love

    ReplyDelete
  6. HelenOctober 28, 2020 at 9:27 AM

    Splendid, absolutely splendid!!!!!

    ReplyDelete
  7. Magaly GuerreroOctober 28, 2020 at 11:08 AM

    I think you did it just right. And I love that call to be exactly who we are. RAWR!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. LisaNovember 1, 2020 at 11:07 AM

      I was going to say it takes courage sometimes to be who we are, or could be, and that might be true, but it shouldn't require courage. We should grow up being who we are without worrying about others. The Others need to allow it.

      Delete
  8. JimOctober 29, 2020 at 4:41 AM

    Good Job, Lisa!! This simple poem say a lot, I should look to poetry next time.
    I like your ending, they are hard to find really good ones with the erasure form.
    "Take your knee" reminds me of our brave athletes who dare to take their knee during our National Anthem. Standing at attention with hand on heart is only "flag etiquette" and not a law at all. In those fellows' precarious positions even driving their cars is scary. We had some of that as teens in town driving but nothing racial, just HARRASSMENT.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. LisaNovember 1, 2020 at 11:10 AM

      I couldn't believe "take" was right there near "your knee!" And those wonderful strong adjectives too! Kneeling is a very respectful action. Anyone who sees it otherwise isn't looking at the action, but the "look" of the kneeler, in my opinion!

      Delete
  9. indybevOctober 29, 2020 at 10:42 AM

    I'm so impressed at the creativity this challenge is presenting. This is beautifully creative and impressive!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. LisaNovember 1, 2020 at 11:11 AM

      Thank you. I agree, it's impressive to read such a variety of wonderful works using the same prompt words. Amazing work.

      Delete
  10. RommyOctober 29, 2020 at 11:54 AM

    You did great with this! I like the fierce new spin.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. LisaNovember 1, 2020 at 11:12 AM

      Thank you. I didn't notice until you mentioned it, how the original poem is so soft and comforting, yet mine can even be read as anger. "Fierce!" I like that!

      Delete
  11. MargaretNovember 10, 2020 at 12:17 PM

    The best erasure poems create a whole different feel and meaning from the original. Well done.

    ReplyDelete

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